This is Emily. I'm very frustrated with the ups and downs. Today, we found out that Trish's donor cannot go through the surgery due to health complications.
This has happened before. And each time, I imagine what my mom's surgery will be like - how she'll feel when she wakes up and her blood is being properly cleaned for the first time in years; her thoughts are less cloudy and she can think more clearly; I think of her being able to take walks with me around the neighborhood again and being able to exercise and get fit and healthy. And then we find out it isn't really going to happen this time after all; something else went wrong.
It's a rollercoaster of emotions; of hopes and anticipations and disappointments, sadness and despair. The reality is, my mother is very, very ill, and I can't help her, but someone else could. From the bottom of my heart I thank those people who have offered and been tested. They are heroes. I know others will do the same. And, once my mother gets a kidney, there are still three uncles left to go and, unless there's a cure, many of my cousins.
There's really no choice but to keep trying for all of them.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
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